The bachelorette party

I have found throughout my wedding, a beautiful way to keep memories is to put it all on my blog or in my diary. So while my memory is still fresh, here is the bachelorette post.

Firstly, I will start off by telling you that I bought a leopard print jumpsuit from Miladys – it was on sale, my size and is the most comfy fabric in the world. I bought this for my party and planned on wearing it every Saturday until the day finally arrived. Luckily, the first Saturday I wore it happened to be D day (so now I will be wearing it everyday of the week).

I arrived at the family’s house, non the wiser but as soon as I spotted my bridesmaids car there I knew something was cooking. It was exciting and overwhelming – all my favourite people were there waiting for me, ME!

The theme was wedding movies (it took me quite a while to notice, at first I thought it was just chick flicks but then I noticed the pattern). The theme was obviously because of my love for movies but also because my clever bridesmaid knew that I wanted one of those movie scene boards (the black ones they use when they say “cut”) for the wedding pics but never ended up getting it so she used that as the start of her planning. This was pretty much the perfect theme!

What followed was present opening, lots of laughs and lots of selfies because guess who got a selfie stick? (this was a must-have for honeymoon).

We said our goodbyes and I was taken off to get dressed for the night out, “the last night as a single lady”. My bridesmaid wasn’t too rough on me with the dressing up part – all black with a sash, alice band, fairy wings, glow in the dark bangles for Africa, a bell, a marriage fund hat – which was supposed to be a bucket but couldn’t be found.

Off we went to Florida Road where I was told I would be doing an “amazing race”. Three tasks at each jol would allow me to move onto the next one. I walked into the first place very nervous because I was going to be asking for money and I only had two drinks in me from much earlier in the day – dutch courage was non-existent. Tequila fixed that very quickly, I also completed my three tasks in record time.

I collected money, I danced, I drank, I joked, I had the best jol and guess what? I remember most of it because despite having many shooters in me, I am really good at remembering my shenanigans so here is my list of highlights and everything I remember very clearly

– I made R500 and some change, which paid for my drinks and bought me Mcdonalds at the end of the night (Best McDs ever!)

– I gave two staunch GP guys the biggest fright when I walked up to their window from the back of the car and shouted hello at them, I then proceeded to ask them for money and when one of them dropped R5 while giving me a whole bunch of change, I gently asked if he would be picking up the R5 and giving it to me.

– I asked an Enforce security guard for money and he gave me some.

– A vendor gave me a packet of those 50c tuckshop chips, he kindly put them into my hat, which pleased me for reasons beyond being a drunk idiot.

– My shoe broke, which caused me to tell the whole world it was broken, drunk dial a friend who I had laughed at when her shoes (the same as mine) broke. I also asked a girl for her Nike’s…. she obviously didn’t give them to me but was a good sport and a really cool gal.

– I asked a man who had dreads if he was from Jamaica (he was from England) and then proceeded to ask him if he smoked weed (which he answered yes to).

– Got given a cigarette (in my hat) and a dudes last piece of gum (which I returned because “he might need it later in case he kisses a girl”).

– I ate just about the whole of McDs and had the best time talking with friends and my mom (that’s right, my mom was there, and laughed with and at me the whole night.. Shout out to an awesome mom).

– I got home and kept the fiancé awake with my stories and of course, I had to go through all my presents again (so spoilt)

11156367_10203666329169203_4609479979258416888_n

The most embarrassing picture I have ever put on the internet

These were just a few of the amazing things that happened. It was an awesome night and I am grateful for all the planning that went into it all.

I now look forward to seeing the fiancé come home at the wee hours of the morning to tell me all about his bulls party shenanigans and then of course, the wedding.

I would love to hear some of your bachelorette stories

Tips for brides to be

Since I am in the last phase of my planning and with less than a month to go, I thought I would share some of what I have learnt during this process. It is fun, it is stressful, it consumes you and at 11pm at night you will lie awake thinking about what colour eyeshadow you want.

– Know that you are not going to please everyone, all the time, so be prepared to be “bridezilla” when it comes to making decisions based on what you want and like.

– Decide what you like and then get off Pinterest! The more you look, the more you will change your mind and doubt any decisions you have made to date.

– You are going to get confused so always take some time to think about something before saying yes. I also found that by limiting the choices (because I am so bad at making them) I felt more at ease with my decisions. I tried to keep the confusion minimal.

– Everyone is going to want to be involved in the planning but the more people, the more heads to bash so try keep those numbers down as well.

– If you want to shed some kilos before the wedding, start asap because the closer the day gets, the more stressed you get about EVERYTHING which can mean stress eating. Also, by having time on your hands you will be able to do it the healthy way and not go to extremes to look how you want to on your special day.

– Triple check EVERYTHING. Trust me, the last thing you want three weeks out from your wedding is to realise that your veil isn’t the same shade of your white as your dress and you now have to try and get your money back for it and find a suitable one. But like I said, triple check everything. Make sure that people who have offered to do certain things are doing them, that your service providers know all the details and just be OCD if you have to.

– Make lists, this will help you to triple check everything, as mentioned above and will also help you stay on top of things. I can’t tell you how many times I have forgotten about payments I have to make (because there are so damn many).

– I have been told that the minor details won’t be a big thing on the day, but as a bride, you worry about the minor things but just do what you can and then leave it at that.

Yes, we all want the perfect day, but remember it is just a day and is definitely not worth losing your sanity over. To be completely honest I didn’t have the best time planning my wedding but it was purely because I got stressed out every time I saw the prices of things or just shut down when something went wrong (I don’t do well in those situations) and now that it is nearly here, i wish I had enjoyed it because it is part of the process and is meant to be fun, so most importantly, enjoy and savour it because it only happens once.

 

Selling made super easy with Gumtree

My fashion and shopping addiction is next level (Confessions of a Shopaholic is basically my life) sooo I have a problem with cupboard space because my little one bedroom granny flat only has one cupboard which is relatively small and I have to share with the hubby to be, of course. But the small cupboard isn’t enough to make me stop shopping and buying clothes so I constantly find myself having to do a clean out because a) it is over full and then I crease everything when looking for something and b) I just always have so much that I don’t wear.

Now add the fact that I often buy something and leave it in the packet, forget about it, and when I find it, dislike it or am “over it” to that equation and I have a lot of unused clothes on my hands with not enough space for them.

I solved this problem though (not the small cupboard or the shopping addiction) with Gumtree. I often turn to Gumtree to sell my cupboard clean outs. It is so easy to upload and attract people because there are always so many people on the hunt for something on the site. But since I consider myself a Gumtree pro, I know this, but there might be some of you who don’t or who are battling to get rid of a few items, or perhaps have never posted on Gumtree. Cue the GUMTREE SELLER GUIDE which is a handy guide for sellers on how to get more replies on their ads.

Gumtree explains it as “As easy as one, two, three” to sell, which it is (so there is no need to hold onto anything unused or clutter). Things such as making sure your ad title will catch attention, uploading good photos and categorizing your ads are a few of the things that will make your selling experience on SA’s biggest classifieds website a success.

rsz_gumtree

If you need some help selling or just want to browse (believe me there is everything you can imagine on there) then leave my blog right now and head to Gumtree to spend all your money, or to make all your money.

We need help!

I am disturbed, I am sad, I am worried about the state of the human race.

You would never normally find me writing about One Direction but this whole Zayn leaving thing has caught my attention. There have been some really funny tweets about it but on the complete opposite end, there has also been the serious side – the #cutforzayn hashtag! I heard about it and shrugged it off until I heard how many posts there were under this hashtag. Curiosity got the better of me so I searched it…. worst mistake! I have this horrible feeling in my stomach, this pure sadness because seeing what people are doing to themselves over a band member leaving is scary!

I am an obsessive person but I cannot imagine being so obsessed with something that I would harm myself over it. As an anxiety and depression sufferer I know what it feels like when things get out of control in your mind, when you experience feelings that nobody can understand. I know what it feels like when your mind goes to worst case scenarios and you just want the feeling to go away but I am so stunned at the triggers nowadays.

Of course, these people have problems and some of them are just looking for a reason to cut but then are the others that are genuinely that cut up about Zayn, that they want to cut themselves up.

Now I am wondering if this has always been something that happens? Did people do this back in the day and it wasn’t known about because there was no such thing as social media? Or have humans just completely lost the way? Are we way too involved with pop culture? What is happening? And how can we fix this?

I don’t know how to process this, I feel sorry for them and I feel sorry for him, can you imagine hearing that because you have made a decision you feel is right for you, people are hurting themselves? Can you imagine what these people are feeling to want to do this to themselves? It is just genuinely sad!

I don’t suggest searching the hashtag because you will feel how I am feeling now, but I do want to know your thoughts.

Stand up for what you believe in

I was reading an article about my soul sister, Lena Dunham this morning and it inspired this blog post.

Basically, Lena will not marry her long time boyfriend Jack Antonoff until there is marriage equality (you can read more here) . Some may say this is silly and she is only spiting herself and her partner, but others, namely me, think that standing up for something she feels so strongly about in such a powerful way, makes a statement about who she is, it says that she will stand up for what she believes in and not doing it in a small way, or sitting behind her computer saying she wants change and expecting it to happen, which once again so many do, namely me.

Another example of standing up for what you believe in is blogger and business owner, Talya Goldberg, recently vegan and making her own differences. In her recent blog posts you will read how she turns down events if it is for a product that is not cruelty free and vegan friendly and how she has taken on brands that don’t know their status.

We need more of this, we need to be stronger, as women, as voices of our generation.

I am guilty of just letting things go because I would rather avoid conflict or because I am not sure what the outcome will be but the truth is we can never predict the outcome of anything and there are always going to be those who disagree with you or your opinion.

Here goes my first attempt at voicing my unfiltered opinions;

In the news

Gavin Rajah needs to take a serious look at his career – changing the colour of a dress doesn’t make it different. Being so blasé about the allegations only causes more irritation amongst those who want answers. We also don’t need someone who obviously sees nothing wrong with copying representing our country in anything. Plagiarism is fraud and we have enough of that!

Body politics

As much as I am all for the fight of plus size being accepted, etc. I think that it’s not only plus size ladies that have body issues or face daily battles so we need to stop focusing on one body type or women of certain weights and work together to help all women, of all shapes and sizes. There is such a focus on plus sized women being victims but all women are victims of the media feeding us with a load of photoshopped crap.

Bloggers

Popular bloggers need to start remembering they also started at the bottom and their readers are who make them who they are so don’t forget to show them appreciation and reply to their comments. Also, be nice to one another, the internet is a world wide web, there is space for all of us.

Social media

This is a space to have your say, but don’t go down hard on people who have their say and you don’t agree. Also, can we just all agree that sub tweeting is for cowards and it is annoying.

Now, I want to hear your opinion on whatever it is you feel strongly about.

Entering the 8th week of F2F Challenge

My weight is an ongoing battle, my regulars will know this as you have followed my journey on Weigh Less, my Well I Am challenge and all my attempts at trying to lose weight. The fact is it is an ongoing struggle for those who are addicted to food, or have come to rely on food for a lot of emotions. As much as I and so many wish we could wake up one day with a changed mindset (which I have done so many times) and it will be enough to drive us to our goal weight, most of the time (well in my case) it is not! Somehow I have always managed to let myself down and fail.

My latest journey is the Fat 2 Fit Challenge with A New Weigh, which I started at the beginning of the year. With my wedding on the way, I really wanted to shed a few kilos and start toning up for the big day. Naturally, I started off so motivated and that motivation has been up and down since then. Because of this, I haven’t lost what I wanted to lose to date however this is nobody’s faulty but my own. I have moments of weakness, I fail to plan, I get so wrapped up in other things that I completely lose focus on my goals and myself. Despite this, I have not given up and that is because of the challenge itself

The support is unbelievable, any time of the day or night I have a question about ANYTHING, the girls who are part of the challenge and Gaelyn and her assistants are there to answer or help. The meals are delicious and don’t cut out any food group (which I am in huge favour of) and it is all simple once you get into it.

I always let myself down but these ladies are preventing me from doing it this time which I am so grateful for.

Today marks the beginning of the 8th week and I plan on going full speed downwards until the end of it and until my wedding.

A New Weigh and Fat 2 Fit are definitely something to look into if you are anything like me.

Books without batteries

Reading is one of my only constant obsessions so I know a thing or two about the magic of a book, I have a serious appreciation for a well researched and curated plot and of course, about reading an actual book and reading an e-book.

I purchased my first e reader about four years ago through Kalahari (I really wanted a Kindle but at the time couldn’t afford one and the Gobi that Kalahari stocked was reasonable and came with a free book voucher so I jumped on it). I was a little disappointed when it arrived because I expected more, nevertheless I read a few books on there, swopped between books and e-books and eventually it just lay there.

In December last year I decided I wanted a Kindle for Christmas because I battle to read books at night, without doing proper research and jumping the gun, I purchased a second hand Kindle in mint condition. I was disappointed in this too because a) I expected more and b) I needed a Kindle paper white (I think) because the one I got was no good for reading at night but rather for in the sun. Within a few days I re-sold the Kindle.

Since then I have been reading actual books and I purchased a bright desk lamp to use at night.

I have nothing against e readers and would like to buy a Kindle (the right one) one day, but I will never, ever, ever stop buying/borrowing books. There is just something I love about holding a new or used book in my hands. Of course, there is also the bookshop trips which I will never give up.

Every time I see a magazine closing down due to lack of sales and each time I see something go completely digital, I get a chill because I will literally cry if this happens with books. As much as I know there are thousands of books out there and that we will never be left with zero books, I am so afraid that authors and publishers decide to start going digital only – perhaps for the environment or because that’s what sells more. Does anyone else worry about this?

I vote for books without batteries!

*Update: I saw this article this morning about books being more in demand than e-books and it made me really happy.